Thursday, July 23, 2009

I Morgan Solemly Swear.....

Ok, enough is enough. I am sick of suck me in panties, love handles and sex with the lights off. I am going to do something about the 15 (used to be 10) lbs that I bitch about as often as Nancy Grace says the word Pervert . It is time to do something about it, before I am forced to retire my bikini for a one piece skirted lycra moo moo, and just in time for my second chin to convince the third one that is about to move in, that I am a slumlord.
So, here it is. I Morgan solemly swear to go on a diet and fitness plan, and blog about it for the world to see. I have printed out a 4 week plan, that seems simple enough. This weekend I will do my grocery shopping for high fiber crackers, lowfat yogurt, edimame and card board. I will look at my schedule and plan my work outs accordingly. I will begin this new lifestyle on Monday July 27th and will keep you all posted.
Here is what I need from you....encouragement. Please feel free to grab my soon to be tiny ass and say "Rock solid". Tell me that my clothes are baggy and that I look emaciated. Comment on my blog, about how well I am doing and how I should rethink my career and become a personal trainer/ super model. Can you do that for me?
Ipromise to be honest, to work hard and to keep you laughing through the whole journey from grocery shopping for fat free food, to sweating my love handles off. Wish me luck!


joanna said...

You know, when I said you were 2 sizes smaller than me I counting in 2s, ya know like, size 6, 8, 10. If you count the junior sizes you are FOUR sizes smaller than me.

However, I hereby give you encouragement.

But I do have to tell you that DIETS DON'T WORK. (Oh, I suck as a friend... but hold on, there's more...) What you need is NOT fat free food. That will make you crave fat and, in general, it has more sugar. You need to borrow my book YOU,On a Diet. Cut out the sugar and refined flour, double your veggies, eat small meals more times a day, and eat a handful of walnuts or almonds 1/2 hour before your meal.

I will be over to grab your skinny ass (but don't you dare grab my flabby one).

heidi said...

Okay, you gotta let me know what is working. I have never had a problem with love handles and extra baggage around the belly area... but you know what happens after all that baby growing time. The problem area stretches and relocating itself just to make more room for the "emotional eating" during my working hours. Eating all the carbs that are offered taste so good with the words "we sit when we eat" "No we dont eat our feet for lunch"... good luck and you can DO IT!!!

Anonymous said...

HAHAHAHA I friggen love you- you skinny little bitch! :)

Love Sarah P

tammyc said...

finally caught up on reading! great stuff. promise to at least look at your ass and comment once a week, at work!

Lynn said...

you are too funny! enjoyed reading about your life- good luck with the