Friday, July 31, 2009

Okay Diet Nazis, Here is Your Update

Seriously, you blog readers are doing a great job of checking in on my diet..thanks alot (typed with obvious underlay of sarcasm). Couldn't you have just ignored that I haven't reported massive weightloss and extreme sexual harrassment...Noooo, you say "enough about your messy house and naughty child, I want to hear more about you love handles and double chin".
So here you go diet Nazi's....
Today is day 5 of Operation Envious Body. Monday I jogged, tuesday I did pilates and wednesday, thursday and friday I did jack shit.
I have been really good about eating small meals of obviously healthy foods though (audience applause).
Cutting down on the vino....not so good.
I am not quitting. I promise to do pilates tomorrow and go for a long walk on Sunday. That will still be working out 4 days this week...not too shabby (or flabby). I will continue to make smarter choices about what i (devour) eat and drink, (red wine with fresca and lime...low cal and fabulous!).
So my journey to emaciation is just going to take a little longer than initially intended, which will give you all the more time to check in on my progress (die Nazi's die!), and all the more time for me to update you.
Inner thought: When I reach fame and fortune and am interviewed by Oprah, I will say these words, and they will one day be carved on my (very narrow) coffin; "If Psychic Sylvia Brown, told me that I would have the body that all others would kill for, by doing one thing- cutting out wine, I would pour myself a glass of Sauvignon Blanc and toast to being chubby."